There are two types of people: Those who put people into groups, and those who don't. That's kind of a joke, kind of not. Sometimes it's good to see people as "just people". Dividing everyone into "us" and "them" usually ends badly for "them". But if we fail to see important distinctions, we can fail to give people what they really need.
I want to look at 12 types of people that we can find in our lives and what they need from us.
First, we have Christians who couldn't doubt if they wanted to. They have had a subjective experience that can never be taken away from them. God bless them! I wish there were more of that type of people. They probably do, too. However, they need a gentle reminder that they are not the norm and that, while their testimony is valid and useful, most people need something more objective, which they should still be able to offer. And if it turns out they were wrong and it is possible for them to doubt, they'll need comfort and support from those who have been there.
Next, we have Christians who can doubt and who are disturbed by questions or pain or things lobbed at them by the world. This is a lot of people at church. First and foremost, they need commiseration. We should never let them feel like they're alone in that struggle or that there is anything to be ashamed of. They also need their fellow believers to point them to answers to the questions. It seems every year we get a new assault on Christianity, usually around Easter, and it always throws some people into a tizzy. They need to know these questions are not the problem the skeptics pretend them to be and that answers abound.
Then we have church members who are not Christians. It's hard to know how many at church fall into this category, but Jesus' warnings suggest it's a frightening number. Some think going to church and checking the boxes makes them "a good person" and that's enough. Some have never really grasped what it means to trust in Jesus. Some are still struggling with the idea that they must earn their salvation. Others think they said the magic prayer and got baptized, so they're free to live any way they please. There are many ways people can go wrong. There's one solution: the gospel. But they may each need to hear it presented differently. Some need to hear God saves us "not because of righteous things we had done, but because of his mercy" (Titus 3:5). Others need to hear that the grace of God "teaches us to say 'No' to ungodliness and worldly passions, and to live self-controlled, upright and godly lives in this present age" (Titus 2:12), that a faith that doesn't change us is no faith at all.
Next are the people who would be "church members who are not Christians," but they don't go to church. It's easy to say the previous group is the pastor's problem, but he probably never gets a crack at these folks. These are the people in our lives who rarely if ever darken the door of a church and are convinced they're right (enough) with Jesus. Like the above group, they have some kind of fundamental misunderstanding of the gospel. Unlike the above group, the burden of rescuing them from that misunderstanding falls squarely on the everyday believer in their lives. Can you share the real gospel with these people? I hope so, because you're probably the only one who can.
Cultural Christians are much like the last group but they may not even have the church upbringing or the Sunday school misunderstanding of salvation. I had a friend tell me that growing up she said her family was Christian because they weren't Jewish or Buddhist, so they must be Christian. Others have absorbed enough of the "Protestant work ethic" or the Evangelical "God loves everyone" to think they're "OK with God" — if they even care about such things. Again, they need to hear the gospel, and it probably needs to begin with the "bad news". The "gift of God is eternal life" doesn't mean much until you understand "the wages of sin is death" (Rom 6:23).
People who belong to other religions used to be something the average American believer never encountered; now they're everywhere, whether they're Muslim, Buddhist, Mormon, or Jehovah's Witness. Many will be the nicest people you ever encounter. They still need Jesus. Without disparaging their current belief system, we need to help them see that only Jesus gives the answer to the problem that plagues humanity — guilt for sin before a righteous God. But Mormons may require a different approach than Muslims. Who do you find to be most common around you? How can you prepare to share the gospel with them? The tiny southern rural town I grew up in has become much more cosmopolitan in the last twenty years. Now I see more hijabs than cowboy hats at the grocery store, so I'll be reading a couple of books on how to share the gospel with Muslims.
However, just like there are cultural Christians, there are also cultural "people who belong to other religions". There are many, for example, who are Muslim in the sense of "Mom and Dad are Muslim, so I guess I should be, too." The Jewish guy who eats bacon or the Muslim girl who drinks may be no more committed to their ancestral religion than your cousin who hasn't been to church in 40 years is to Christianity. But that doesn't mean they don't still respect it. Again, without disparaging the religion of their ancestors, they need to hear that Jesus is the only way to be right with God.
What about those who are "spiritual but not religious"? This can include people who have a vague sense of "there's something out there" but don't have any real belief and what Tara Burton calls "remixed" religions, where they blend a little of this and a little of that. They may be a "cafeteria Catholic" with a little Buddhism thrown in. They might be dabbling in modern Wicca or Norse religions. I think the biggest thing we have to be careful of is to not make assumptions. Instead, ask questions. People love to talk about themselves, so prompt them with open-ended questions and encourage them to keep talking. Once you have a good idea what they do believe you can hopefully see where their beliefs most clearly fail to provide what they really need and show them how the gospel of Jesus is the real cure for what ails them.
Believe it or not, there are cultural atheists. It's common for atheists in the West to claim to merely lack belief. Some actually do — they were raised in an atheist environment and have honestly never really given the matter serious thought. A Chinese Christian, Li Cheng, wrote a book for Chinese cultural atheists called Song of a Wanderer that is kind of eye opening. More and more people in the West, especially in Europe, may be raised in that kind of default atheism and may need that kind of gentle, thoughtful approach.
But in the West, especially in the US, we're going to find more thoughtful agnostics. These are people who aren't thoughtlessly nonbelievers, but they're not totally committed to nonbelief either. They are open to the possibility of the divine, but they don't think there's any evidence. OK, this is tough: For some, "evidence" means something that no one could ever possibly provide. But some have simply bought the popular skeptical line that "there is no evidence" and never really looked any further than that. They need to hear that there are good reasons to believe in God, to trust the Bible, and to think Jesus really did rise from the dead — and so good reasons to trust in and follow Jesus. Apologetics is the prelude to the gospel.
Some don't care, though. Committed atheists are not even open to the conversation. Some will admit, for example, that if they saw a message to them written in fire in the sky, they'd assume they were hallucinating. No evidence will ever be good enough. But sometimes these people do become Christians. They need believers who love them, who model the best of Christianity, who patiently converse with them, and who pray for them. This is how CS Lewis became a Christian. Don't count anyone out; there is no limit to what the Holy Spirit can do.
"Ex-Christians"1 may be the hardest case of all. I've observed that no one hates smoking as much as ex-smokers. I think no one is so hardened as an "ex-Christian". In many cases, they've heard all of our best arguments before. They went through a lot to "come out" as an unbeliever and frequently seem to have made that their new identity. Giving that up and saying "I was wrong" would be very hard for them. But some do. Ex-Christians seem to make Christians angry and defensive like no one else, but we can't be that. What they need from us is patience, prayer, and gentle perseverance. One day they may listen to the Holy Spirit.
Who do you have the most of in your life? How can you prepare to help them? We cannot make anyone believe; only the Holy Spirit can change hearts. However, he uses our efforts in many ways. You never know who will listen. You never know who is ripe for the harvest. You may be just one of many to water the seed. You may be the one who gets to witness their bending the knee to Jesus. What can you do? Are you willing?
Because ultimately there ultimately only 1 kind of people: those who need Jesus.
1 Christians will debate whether these people were never truly believers or are apostate believers, whether it's possible to lose your salvation. It doesn't matter here. Arguing with them about whether they were ever "really Christians" is not going to bring them to Christ.
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